Being consistent and observing a daily routine helps reduce the chaos and stress children experience in the absence of order. Consistency and routine provide a structure for everyday life and creates manageable expectations.
Like you, your child also needs the order that consistency and following a routine provides. Oftentimes, children with special needs suffer from anxiety when they do not know what to expect. The result is a shift in behavior that typically appears in the form of frustrations and grumpiness.
However, helping your child understand what to expect throughout their day has a positive impact on their behavior. The order of a routine provides comfort and security for your child.
Qualities of a Good Routine and How to Create a Structure that Your Child Understands Easily
It is every parent’s joy to see their child happy and fulfilled at every moment of the day. Routine and structure add ease to your life by reducing the chaos in your day and letting you experience a peaceful and joyful day with your child.
For the benefit of your child, consistency and routine in their life means things happen around the same time and in the same way each day. The order and progression created by a routine ensures your child knows what to expect throughout the day.
When a child knows what to expect, they gain confidence, independence, and a sense of control over their routine. In turn, the control breeds enthusiasm and as your child gets used to the routine, it reduces the power struggles you may have with them.
That said, it’s essential that you make your routine fun to keep it interesting. One way of making your routine fun is rewarding your child for completing specific activities, especially those that they find less desirable.
For instance, after running a few errands, you can reward your child by including a trip to the park.
How to Provide Structure for Your Child
When examining an ideal structure for your child, I like going back to the basics and creating a routine of how your typical day might look. An easy way of establishing a routine is breaking down your daily activities into sections.
Once you break down your day into sections, each with an activity that will recur daily, you have a foundation for your routine. Here is a simple breakdown of a typical day:
- Early morning – wake up, use the bathroom, brush teeth, dress, breakfast
- Mid-morning – at-home activities like tending to chores, planned outings such as school, or running errands
- Lunchtime – a structured mealtime at the same time of the day every day
- Afternoon – This could include a nap after lunch and some set activities after the nap
- Dinner – just like lunchtime, set a specific time for dinner that is the same each day. You could share a meal as a family or simply spend time with your child as they have their dinner
- Evening – this is time to wind down from the days’ activities. It could include playtime, or feature an activity such as watching a movie, taking a bath, reading a story and then heading to bed.
The routine described above is only a sample of what’s possible. I recommend personalizing it and including activities that fit into your lifestyle and that of your child.
Of course, even on the best-planned day, there will be times when you’ll need some changes. An appointment may be canceled, or someone may be running late. It helps to have a plan for these times too. Change is often difficult for special needs children.
Whenever possible, make your child aware of the change as calmly as possible and with a positive attitude. Give them time to process the information without expecting them to simply pivot their focus and adjust to the change as quickly as you may.
It’s times when you need to change a set routine that your child needs your patience and support most.
Consistency and routine are essential in everyday life. Their most significant benefit is offering stability for you and your child even when times are unpredictable.
You can control what happens in your child’s life with consistency and routine by providing a controlled environment.
By creating a consistent pattern, you’ll help reduce the chaos of uncertainty in your child’s life and thus relieve their stress.
